November 26, 2021

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Food Network Presents: Beat Off Bobby Flay!


Moe Lester 
July 31, 2021 

It’s not what you think. Bobby is single and is dating your daughter. It’s time to beat him off.

Well, it’s what you think. You get to compete against several others at the chance to beat off Bobby Flay.

You will show off you culinary and chopping skills. You will sweat and pour your heart into your food.

If you are good enough, you will get to have a dessert from Bobby himself.

Hand churned whipping cream to add to your final presentation.

It’s time to show your skills and prove that you are a champion of Beating Off Bobby Flay!

I can hear the crowd now. "Beat Him Off! Beat Him Off!”

Platty's Editor Note: Practice with a cucumber if you need to.

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About Platty

He doesn't care about the satire news bullshit anymore and wants to only bring music reviews to the people.

He isn't the founder anymore of a old consortium called the NeoDemoRepublicLiberTeaConserveAsshole Party.

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