February 25, 2021

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Melania Confirms Presidential Load Lumpy Oily Cheese Sauce!

Moe Lester 
June 20, 2019 

Yup! That's it. The whole article in one title.

It's also the strangest phone interview that I have ever experienced. I can tell you that I have changed.

I no longer look at canned cheese the same ever again. I'm sorry Velveeta but I can no longer consume your products.

Nachos, Quesadilla’s, Mac and Cheese and the list goes on. Maybe some day I’ll consume these foods again without the current memory burn.

Just look at his face and then move your gaze up and take in the fruits of your labor if you are ever so lucky to be with this iconic man. I have a feeling you would have the facial expression of Melania trying to hold back her vomit.

We did talk in depth about lumpiness and consistency. There were times it was very runny and other times very oily. I don’t know but she kept saying “Be Best Donald, Be Best!” I was perplexed. She left me with one last piece of information. She said that she makes the best cheesy bread during certain fungal infections. I am certainly puzzled and not sure I want to be unpuzzled.

Platty’s Editor Note: This is certainly a cheesy article but so worth it. Moe is a bit twisted but in a good way.

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About Platty

He is tired of your fake news bullshit and wants to bring the real news to the people.

He is the founder of a new consortium called the NeoDemoRepublicLiberTeaConserveAsshole Party.

He brings the news that you don't want at any cost.