October 18, 2021

Entertaining You Since 2019!


breaking news

Gamers Are NOT Athletes!

Oopsai Scharted 
September 04, 2021 

Let’s get this straight right now.

Gamers are not athletes!

No way in hell is gaming a sport.

Yes, they use their eyes, mind, fingers and thumbs but there are other parts of the body that games do not use.

If an athlete gets a cramp or gets hurt this was due to physical aspect of him using his mind and body.

A gamer gets a cramp or carpel tunnel syndrome then his injury is due to a shitty diet and being a fat ass.

Gamers do play sports games but that does not make them an athlete.

Gamers wish they could be athletes but let’s face it. THEY ARE NOT!

Athlete: A person who is proficient in sports and other forms of physical exercise.

Gamer: A person who regularly plays computer or video games.

There it is.

Stop the bullshit!

Platty's Editor Note: How long will it be, before people start naming their kids after Pokemon.


Other Works by the Author!

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BORKNAGAR: Quintessence 09/24/21
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BAL-SAGOTH: Starfire Burning Upon the Ice-Veiled Throne of Ultima Thule 09/11/21
New Compatible PS5 / XBOX Controller Leaked! 09/07/21
Gamers Are NOT Athletes! 09/04/21
TLC Now Creating Simpson Characters! 09/02/21
January 6th Insurrection Was Just Spartan Race Capitol Edition! 08/11/21
Man’s Crevice Grows Bigger Thanks to Ocrevus! 08/07/21
Old Man Praying for Death Given Vaccine! 08/05/21
Doctors Confirm Covid-19 Not Transferable Ass to Mouth! 08/01/21
Redbox Adds Dick Suckers to Boost DVD Rentals! 07/29/21
Louie-Bloo Because He Needed the Money! 07/23/21
Moxie, The Official Beverage Of 2020! 07/22/21
Man Looking to Get Laid at Hooker Furniture! 07/19/21
Man Quarantines Himself with A Case of Coronavirus! 07/16/21
Instagram Yoga Instructors Show You Their Flexible Hoo-Ha’s! 07/10/21
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White Man Finally Installs Button Under Desk That Locks His Office Door! 06/27/21


About Platty

He doesn't care about the satire news bullshit anymore and wants to only bring music reviews to the people.

He isn't the founder anymore of a old consortium called the NeoDemoRepublicLiberTeaConserveAsshole Party.

He brings the music reviews that you don't want at any cost.