January 25, 2021

Entertaining You On The Shitter Since 2019!

breaking news

Victoria's Secret? Her Penis!

Dawn Keybawls
February 05, 2020

We all know 99% of women on this Earth do not look like the skinny bitches that are called angels.

The Victoria Secret Angels to be exact.

These women are so close to natural perfection that they are goddesses.

The only problem is their secret.

Their secret is hard to overcome. The secret has lots of girth and a long history of questionability.

Their secret is their tucked penis.

They are so hot that once you realize the issue has been untucked, you won’t care.

Why would you want bone on bone?

I’ve got some cushion for the pushing. Shit, slamming on that clam type of cush for the push.

There is no outie here!

Stop fascinating on the unattainable and focus on the what’s real.

A chick with a dick!

Platty’s Editor Note: Well hello Dawn. It’s nice to see you after a dark cold night!

Home Random Article

Other Works by the Author!

	Burger King Introduces New BK Turkey Fries!	04/23/20
	Woman Hoping the Next iPhone Is A Pleasure Model!	03/04/20
	White Man with Tan Accused of Brownface!	02/21/20
	President Believes a Whistleblower is a Felatious Woman!	03/16/20
	Man Hopes Everyone Sees His Bladder Control Underwear!	04/01/20
	Racist Drummer Refuses to Play Black Metal!	07/31/20
	Woman Cannot Wait to Be Spatchcocked Tonight!	05/27/20
	Woman is Addicted to Secondhand Smoke!	05/01/20
	Mid Forties Man Okay Being Subject of Taylor Swift’s Next Hit Tune!	07/02/20
	Woman Excited to Put Hot Wood into Her Fireplace!	05/28/20
	Man Suffers from Covid-Penis!	10/15/20
	Denny’s Mobile Relief Truck Overtaken by Drunk College Students!	05/19/20
	Man Robs Peter to Pay Paul Because Peter Is an Asshole!	11/23/19
	President Claims Only Finger Tip Went into Ukraine’s Presidents Ass!	09/29/19
	Heineken 0.0 Dumped and Filled with Real Beer!	09/04/20
	Asshole Walmart Greeter Watches Woman Pay but Scans Receipt Anyways!	01/12/20
	Vegetation Secretly Farming Humans for Food!	08/23/20
	Sometimes It Just Takes A Good Whacking!	01/09/21
	Santa Came in Record Number of Chimneys and Back Doors!	12/24/20
	Teacher Misses Having Sex with Her Students!	12/03/20