September 24, 2021

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breaking news

Man is Approaching His Last Fuckable Day!

Benjamin Dover 
June 23, 2021 

Peter Johnson is turning 63 and he know his last fuckable day is coming.

Younger girls with daddy issues are looking for men in their 40 and 50’s but they don’t have granddaddy issues so men in their 60’s are out of the question.

Women his age don’t want anything to do with him as he is a single man and women assume there is something wrong with him and they don’t want a one night stand.

His penis has been down lately, but Peter has been trying to keep the little guys spirits up by giving it hope that somewhere there is a woman that wants to spend some time with him.

He knows his package is not the package it once was. Parts are not as tight, and he know the temperature of the toilet water when seated at the toilet. Things are hanging lower these days.

Prescription products help his package but it’s really hard when he is flying solo.

His forearms usually give out first.

This is why he knows his last fuckable day countdown has begun.

Platty's Editor Note: I grew a beard thinking it would say 'Distinguished Gentleman.' Instead, turns out it says, 'Senior Discount, Please!'

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About Platty

He doesn't care about the satire news bullshit anymore and wants to only bring music reviews to the people.

He isn't the founder anymore of a old consortium called the NeoDemoRepublicLiberTeaConserveAsshole Party.

He brings the music reviews that you don't want at any cost.